There isn't really any metaphor with the Fourth Pillar of the American Dream. It is exactly what you think it is. It's an activity that brings one excitement and relaxation. That means that you're probably thinking that this is a pretty easy pillar to achieve. I mean everybody has a hobby, don't they? Well, not exactly. You see while everybody has something that they enjoy doing in their spare time...not everybody has readily achieved this pillar. Not all activities are hobbies and not all hobbies are created equal. This Pillar is about getting the most fulfillment out of your spare time as possible. Not just every hack job hobby applies in this situation. I'm reminded of the immortal words of Raylan Givens on FX's hit show Justified: "I figure everyone is entitled to their hobbies and I'm entitled to think those people are creepy." I'm not in a good position to judge what other people do with their free time, but in order to fulfill this Pillar of the American Dream there are a few parameters and ground rules that need to be adhered to. The Hobby is not about spending your free time...it's about investing your free time. So let's go over what you need to do achieve this deceptively elusive Pillar.
The Hobby cannot be something that you do for a living. You might love your job, and that's fair. Contentment in your occupation is very important when pursuing the Lush Life. But it's heavily irrelevant when we are talking about The Hobby. A job is still a job and it takes away from a hobby when somebody is paying you to do it. That means that they possess a certain amount of control over how you do what you love to do and that's not the Lush Life. You might love to cook, but by having to pander to customer orders this makes being a chef not a hobby. I don't care if you prepared the menu and you love to cook everything on it. If somebody is paying you then it is work. The fact that your hobby comes with obligations makes it not The Hobby. A possible loophole is if you run your own business...like making designer handbags and selling them on line. But at that point you don't have a job, you have a hobby that you've found a way to make money from.
I have consistently stated that I would not want to be employed to do anything that I love to do because it's bound to become not fun anymore when you make it into a job. The ice cream man doesn't go home and eat ice cream. And even though I love to blog, I wouldn't want to become a featured writer for some web site. I don't want some suit telling me when to blog and what to blog about. You can't say that basketball is LeBron James hobby and you can't say stand-up comedy is Chris Rock's hobby. This is because while The Hobby should be something that you are good at your hobby, it shouldn't come with expectations that will be lead to disappointment in others should you have an off night. If people pay to see a stand-up comic and he sucks they can be rightfully be pissed. If a comic sucks at an open mic night, the audience cannot reasonably be mad because they didn't have to shell out any big bucks to see this performer. The same goes for pick-up basketball. Sure you're teammates might be peeved if you're air balling threes but nobody is going to rip you on Around the Horn the next day. The purpose of The Hobby is to have excitement and get your adrenaline pumping but it's also to relax. I don't think Bron Bron ever gets to relax on the basketball court. Sports fans tend to make sure of that.
This brings us to another qualifier for The Hobby. The Hobby has a two-fold purpose. It must possess both the ability to excite and relax. If your hobby does nothing but stress you out then it isn't The Hobby. You might like to golf, but every time you slice a shot it can't set your blood boiling. If this is the case, then you need to know that golf is not The Hobby for you. Golf is The Hobby for me. I just love to be out on the course swinging some sticks with my homies. The same goes for bowling. I like to go out and roll rocks with my homies. But if I have an off day on the lanes, I let it roll right off my back. It's perfectly acceptable to be competitive within your hobby. That's part of the excitement that The Hobby is supposed to offer. But if you don't take losing well then this can be a problem. An example of this for me is Pub Trivia. Pub Trivia is certainly The Hobby for me...but it isn't always The Hobby. You're confused? Let me explain. I find Pub Trivia to be relaxing. It's a nice chance for me to get together with friends and use some of my cerebral skills. It also excites me as there is a sense of competition with prizes on the line and it keeps my brain constantly engaged to produce answers. However, when the Trivia Finals come around and $3000 is on the line, it no longer becomes relaxing. Losing becomes a big deal and every missed answer haunts my nightmares for weeks. At this point the stress that it puts upon my person stops it from being The Hobby. It doesn't mean that I'm going to stop going to the Finals because it is fun, but there is no relaxation present.
In all of my hobbies above I mentioned that I prefer to enjoy the company of others while I am living The Hobby. It is certainly possible to live The Hobby by yourself, but you can't always live The Hobby by yourself. You're confused? Let me explain. There is nothing wrong with living The Hobby by yourself. I know that after a particularly stressful day I enjoy winding down with some trivia and if nobody else is in the mood, I will go by myself. Sometimes I'll even take in a round of golf by my lonesome. However, The Hobby should be something that can be done by yourself or with others. I'm not going to make it a rule that you have to be able to do it by yourself. Racquetball is a perfectly acceptable hobby, but to be done properly it requires multiple people. However, The Hobby loses traction when your ability to live it rests too heavily on other people. In it's truest form The Hobby is something that you can do whenever you please, but the necessitated participation of others as well as the Hours of Operation of various necessary venues can limit this ability. There are also seasonal hobbies that require certain weather. However, The Hobby necessitates that it is something that can be done socially and that you can share with others. The Lush Life is about sharing and you can't just be greedy and keep your hobby to yourself. If you like to sing in the shower, but you're unwilling to flex the pipes for others than singing is not a hobby for you. Taxidermy and needlepoint are not usually considered as being The Hobby, but if you and your friends get together to partake of these activities then I don't know that they can't be. If you aren't proud enough to share it with loved ones it isn't The Hobby. Dexter might think that he has a hobby, but killing people in not The Hobby.
It matters less to The Hobby what you're doing than it does how it makes you feel. The purpose of living The Lush Life and achieving the American Dream is to be content and achieve a Zen-like state. Therefore, The Hobby has to provide you with some semblance of control over your mood. If it is not capable of altering your mood in a way that is predictable or that you can in some way harness, then it likely is not really The Hobby. The Hobby should be able to calm you when you need calming. The Hobby should be able to excite you when you need excitement. The Hobby should challenge you and keep you motivated. It's important that you don't let The Hobby become too routine. There should be a certain level of skill on your part with regards to The Hobby, and whether you possess this skill or not you should always be trying to improve. If you're too routine in your practicing of The Hobby it's bound to get boring. Mix it up. Variety is the spice of life. And the Lush Life is not about stagnancy. You can't just have the Lush Life. You have to actively live it. If you're not like a shark, always moving forward, you're going to lose it. So if you have a hobby, try and take it to the next level. Master your craft and challenge yourself, and if you're constantly pursuing new goals though your hobby then you'll be well on your way to The Hobby.
I can't decide if video gaming is my Hobby.
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